March 6th
 

theresa albert - my friend in food

 

Top 8 Reasons to Stay on the Comfy Chair

comfy chair

At this time of year we are bombarded with lists that tell us in easy steps how to achieve our health goals.  Sometimes these quick “how-to” articles just bring out the rebel in me and I feel it’s time to take inaction.  The comfy chair beckons and the following are my justifications:

 

1.  Sitting still requires very little effort and causes no pain, provided you don’t get up.

2. If you have a laptop, you can catch up on all the great cat videos on YouTube and if you have a TV, you can do the equivalent by watching all the entertainment shows (some videos of celebrities are even more amusing then their feline counterparts!).

3. The comfy chair is safe.  There’s no chance of slipping on the ice or tripping on uneven pavement and very little chance of pulling a muscle.

4. If your children are showing signs of early childhood obesity, you can go online to find them maps for the nearest municipal recreation facilities and tell them how to get there.  Surely sending them on their own will foster a sense of independence?

5. You can email your doctors to let them know in no uncertain terms that you’re not fooled by all the studies that show how exercise reduces the risk of degenerative disease, battles depression and increases daily energy.

6. If your family wants to have fun together, just center all activities around you.  Think how many things you can do from this position: eating snacks, playing video games, doing Sudoku, chatting on the phone… a full and fulfilling social life!

7. Staying in the chair will keep you from meeting new people who might hurt your feelings if you befriend them and will keep you from trying new things which could take you out of your comfort zone.  It will save you from finding success through a series of failures.

8. Finally, a good comfy chair will allow enough room for your ever widening posterior and will be a strong support for your back as your core muscles deteriorate.  When it ultimately gets too difficult to retire to your bedroom, you can always stay put to sleep.  After all, it’s comfortable, right?  Here’s wishing you a happy, healthy new year!

Ilana

Ilana

Ilana Waldston is the mother of two teenage girls who keeps sane by singing. A graduate of the prestigious International Cabaret Conference at Yale, she’s been delighting Toronto audiences with her comedic patter and well-honed ability to sell a song. She’s a self-professed foodie, loves to bake, travel and dine (often all at once) who sometimes sings of food in songs such as “My Diet Starts Tomorrow”, “Dieter’s Prayer” and “Foodblooz”. In addition to her solo work, she’s also a part of Toronto’s only female jazz quartet, The Satin Dolls... www.jazznlaughs.ca

 

2 Responses

    Liz
    January 10, 2012 at 2:05 pm Reply

    Very funny! And not a spelling mistake or grammatical error — well done, Ilana!

    Ilana
    January 10, 2012 at 3:42 pm Reply

    Thank you, Liz!
    (Readers, Liz Tansey is my “grammar sergeant” who usually edits my blogs (not this time!) before you all can make fun of my grammar, punctuation and spelling. She’s an invaluable asset! (and also, a terrific personal organizer: http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Organizer-Toronto/135399693169502)

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